At home with yourself

September 13, 2022 | Montreal, QC

JP15: what is home?

Earlier today I received news that I will be receiving my visa tomorrow. This means I'm officially going to France for the next 7 months to be a language assistant. I could not be happier! Moving to France has been a goal of mine for the last 4/5 years. I was originally supposed to go during my third year of university as a part of a study abroad program, but unfortunately due to Covid it was cancelled.

I think that one reason I am so looking forward to moving is because I don't necessarily see myself living in Canada for the rest of my life. There's nothing about it that I feel particularly attached to, at least not enough to to call it home. And that's even after having lived in Toronto, Peterborough, Canmore, and now Montreal.

What excites me about France is the same reason that scares me and it's the fact that I want to know if I can actually see myself living and building a home for myself in France. This idea of 'home' has been a big motivation for me lately. I'm not just traveling around for a quick vacation, I'm moving around with purpose because I really just want to find a place that I can call home.

But a few weeks ago, I came across something online that mentioned how you'll never find a home in a new place if you don't feel at home with yourself. It was a eye opener and it scared me. It made me begin to question what it is that I am looking for in a home. And I could not think of an answer off the top of my head.